Hello & welcome (:
Goodbye if it's not fun.

CHEM was easy peasy la! so much easier den any past year paper! i think i can pass it with flying colours but when added wid BIO, everything will be pulled down. have to work hard for MCQs le. SS was easier den i expected can pass but not with flying colours. same goes for EMATHS pp1, can pass but might not be with flying colours. now im having trouble to do my amaths which is before pyhsics which im havong trouble in it too. sigh ~ its ENG tmw! and i dunno if i can make it. my languages sucks big time!

anyway have a hearty laugh ahead!

1. One Chinese person walks into a bar in America late one night and he saw Steven Spielberg. As he was a great fan of his movies, he rushes over to him, and asks for his autograph. Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap and says "You Chinese people bombed our Pearl Harbor, get out of here."
The astonished Chinese man replied, "It was not the Chinese who bombed your Pearl Harbor, it was the Japanese".
"Chinese, Japanese, Taiwanese, you're all the same," replied Spielberg.
In return, the Chinese gives Spielberg a slap and says "You sank the Titanic, my forefathers were on that ship."
Shocked, Spielberg replies, "It was the iceberg that sank the ship, not me."
The Chinese replies, "Iceberg, Spielberg, Carlsberg, you're all the same."

2. Man comes home , finds his wife with his friend in bed . He shoots his friend and kills him.
Wife says, "If you behave like this, you will lose ALL your friends!"

3. A small Boy wrote to Santa Claus," send me a brother"
Santa wrote back," SEND ME YOUR MOTHER!"

4. What is the definition of Mistress?
Someone between the Mister and Mattress

5. Husband asks , "Do u know the meaning of WIFE??
Without Information Fighting Everytime
Wife replies,"No, it means With Idiot For Ever !!!"

6. What's the difference between stress, tension and panic?
Stress is when wife is pregnant,
Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant,
and Panic is when both are pregnant.

7. Teacher: Do you know the importance of a period?
Kid: Yeah, once my sister said she has missed one, my mom fainted, dad got a heart attack & our driver ran away.

8. A women asks man who is traveling with six children, "Are all these kids yours??"
The man replies, " No, I work in a condom factory and these are customer complaints".

9. A young boy asks his Dad, "What is the difference between confident and confidential.
Dad says, "You are my son, I'm confident about that. Your friend over there, is also my son, that's confidential!"